Sincerely, Olya

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What's holding you back?

Photo by Simon Matzinger

Through my process, I have come to realize that the confidence in our identity is so completely interwoven with the ability to walk out our God-given dreams. Yet so often, we find ourselves partnered with fear and insecurity to such a degree that it prevents the dream from becoming a reality. This manifests itself in so many ways as we become blinded and entangled within its hold. As fear and insecurity continue to infect our life, we try to store up security walls to protect ourselves against it. But as a result, these very walls of protection actually keep lies about ourselves hidden and inhibit us from hearing God speaking truth and confidence into our identity.

... when I entertain thoughts about myself that are not true to what is on the mind of Christ, I stand in opposition to what He is speaking over me and shut down my ability to hear clearly what He is saying.

Until those lies are exposed, we will not be able to fully embrace and walk in the truth that He speaks over us. Despite our propensity to this, God is confident in His ability to bring about change in our life. He calls us out by what He sees we will become and not where we currently reside. He needs our hearts to be soft in this process. In my own life, when I entertain thoughts about myself that are not true to what is on the mind of Christ, I stand in opposition to what He is speaking over me and shut down my ability to hear clearly what He is saying. In this process, I learned to embrace the uncomfortable and let down my walls, allowing the Lord to uproot lies I had carried about myself. A house we rented in the past had these amazing rose bushes that would often get attacked by an invasion of weeds. I remember that if I did not pull out these weeds right away, the deeper its roots would grow. They would finally entangle themselves with the rose bush root system, and it became difficult to tell the difference between the good roots and the bad. So while pulling at the weeds, often times the rose bush roots would be torn out in the process.

In this example, the weeds represent the lies we carry within. Imagine that you are a beautiful, luscious rose bush. When hearing a lie, we allow its seed to find a place in our soil and begin to entangle itself in our very own root system. When a deep lie is uprooted, it will often feel like a very messy process as it carries with it our own roots and ‘dirt’ from our past. It can put a strain on even the healthy roots, but the process must continue to allow the healthy soil to replace and fuel the rose bush growth without the entanglement of weeds choking the process. Oftentimes, the lie has found a resting place in our soil for so long that we grow comfortable with it and even protective of it. The Truth of our identity becomes entangled in the lies, causing a difficulty deciphering what is true and what is a lie. Furthermore, if what people say to you does not align with God’s words toward you, do not let those words dictate your life and do not allow them to become a part of your root system. You must invite the Lord into the process of uprooting the lie and rooting Truth in its place. Allowing Him into the garden of your heart on a daily basis will not only give you a well-watered soil but will keep your heart free of weeds attempting to root themselves in your heart.

“How would you treat a friend, that lied to you as often as your fears lie to you.”

All roots find their origins in two places, from either love or fear. And from these two places, we bear fruit that is influenced by those roots, whether positive or negative. Fear is what channels many of the lies into our imagination, trying to have its hold on our thought life, and as a result our future. Jack Hayford said, “How would you treat a friend, that lied to you as often as your fears lie to you.” From these rooted lies, springs a life of insecurity. Growing up not receiving the love and affirmation a daughter needs, established an orphan way of thinking and produced insecurity. I discovered that insecurity is in part a manifestation of a love deficit. One important factor in overcoming this insecurity was learning to know the love of God for myself. He teaches us to live from a place of a continual exchange of love. Just like Mary, who sat at the feet of Jesus and soaked in the love of His heart rather than trying to earn favor with Him through service. Insecurity has a way of causing us to work for love rather than from a place of love. It causes us to think like an orphan rather than a son or daughter. My confidence can be grounded because I know who my Daddy is. I do not have to earn a place in His house, rather I already have a place in His house because I am His daughter. When I know that I belong, I can live out of my inheritance and walk from a place of authority. The favor of God is already working out all things for my good, and I do not need to try and maintain that. As I continue to encounter the love of God, it transfers to the way I demonstrate it toward myself and people. To have confidence is to know who He says you are and not be hindered in love.

Insecurity prohibits you from going forward, but love calls you deeper and causes you to push through the fears.

God will often resurface the points in our life where we have adopted a certain way of thinking due to our experiences. He does this to bring about a confidence to walk in our true inheritance and break out of the mold formed by our own disbelief, that's been shaped by our past. God is determined to bring us through the gates of truth and into the freedom He died to give us. He does not want us to tolerate a mindset entangled in lies. Sometimes, we come to those places where we feel like we have just gone in circles and are facing those same emotions that we thought were conquered years ago, and it can feel quite discouraging. However, I have found that all the growth experienced in the Lord is not lost, but rather He is actually expanding your capacity for confidence. It is like building blocks that are shaping a clearer picture of who He says you are as a daughter, not an orphan. Often, this is found in those challenging times where you feel like you are stepping out of the boat and fear is surrounding you. This is the place where you can choose to grow or to retreat away from growth. Insecurity tries to prohibit you from going forward, but love calls you deeper and causes you to push through the fears. God wants you to know that you are loved and you are safe. Do not be afraid.

So what are my thought patterns? How do I think about myself, my past, my present, and future? I have aspired to look at all of what I’m being challenged by and not be discouraged or intimidated, but rather align myself with a higher way of thinking, His perspective. I choose to see this as an opportunity to grow in maturity. I am closer to greater breakthrough; I am closer to greater victory! I want to declare my strength and watch it become a reality. One powerful way I have found in becoming more victorious is to prophesy over myself. I want to feed my mind with what God is saying. I want to be a surrendered vessel and be pregnant with the promises of His words and not a carrier of lies. I want to carry out His words on the inside of me, His words are life-giving. Don’t give in to the temptation that those negative thoughts are just who you are. Who did God say you are? That’s who you are! Don’t empower, or permit even a little, a thought life about yourself that doesn’t exist on the mind of Christ.

I will continue this subject in the following post. In the meantime, I urge you to ask yourself some of the questions I covered in this post, and we will connect again soon